Desperate Measures

Title: Desperate Measures
Author: temperance_k
Pairing: Erik/Charles
Rating: PG-13

Written for the (long) prompt: "The inhabitants of Charles' estate (Charles, his conniving younger sister Raven, his adorable but mischievous adopted children, and their live-in handyman Erik) have been growing restless. To keep the children (who range in age from kindergarten to fifth or sixth grade) from destroying everything in sight, Charles comes up with a scavenger hunt of sorts. The objective? To find his "heart" (which is actually a heart-shaped photo of everyone).

The children are obviously distraught to learn that Charles' heart has been "stolen" and are more than willing to search every last inch of the property to reclaim it. When they finally do, they are quite confused to find a chunk of it missing.

Unbeknownst to Charles, Raven decided to play matchmaker instead of just hiding the heart, sick of all the sexual tension between him and Erik. She cut out the little portion of the photo with Charles and Erik in it and delivered it to Erik. (Bonus if she says something along the lines of, "This is possibly the most precious gift that anyone has ever given you. Damage it in any way and your body will never be found." and Erik is horribly confused.)

Hilariously, the children immediately assume that Erik must have the rest of Charles' heart (because Charles keeps making those funny faces at him, like he's Christmas and a puppy at the same time or something equally wonderful). They go assault him and somehow Erik comes to the realization that Charles may actually love him back as the children are climbing all over him demanding that he give them back the rest of Charles' heart."

This may be the most adorable fic in the history of adorable fics. The beginning was a little sad and a little wistful, but once the children arrived, shenanigans ensued! Raven cracks me up with her devious little matchmaker skills, and "'A little bit of both,” Charles admits, and Erik's eyes can't seem to decide if they're lighting up in joy or dimming in confusion. “But the basement part is only because I know I'm so very bad at this'" is ahhhhhhh SO CUTE MY HEART <3 <3 <3